Be You!
Do me a favor right now…From here on out…STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS!
I think the sooner we women can do this, the better off we will be.
Years ago buying and spending way too much time with magazines was a big past time for me. It’s what teenagers did. There were no cell phones and t.v. was limited.
I could get lost in the latest fashion magazine, where it was being photographed and all the endless clothing changes. It was all very appealing and made me wonder what the models were like being so happy and perfect. It was always so exciting to get the latest monthly issue.
But there was always one thing wrong. By the end of the magazine I would feel down and deflated. I wasn’t like the young women in the magazines. They were tall and beautiful and full of life.
Whereas I was short, plain and an introvert.
Train Your Brain
I was comparing myself to them every month. And when a young woman does this, over time that non accepting image and negative self talk becomes who you are. It’s a crazy hamster wheel that’s hard to jump off of.
But being an over thinker I spent time going over the problem. One day I realized that if my brain had lead me to think one way, then why couldn’t I train my brain to think another way?
I can remember standing in line at the grocery store looking at the magazine summer editions with the perfect bikini bodies thinking…”I would never be able to do that.” It just left me with a sense of not being good enough.
Then the news stories started saying that the magazine cover photos were being altered! This is known to be fact now, but at the time was news! Magazines didn’t want it to be known. Thighs were being slimmed down and breasts were being pumped up!
What in the holy hell was happening?! Magazines weren’t telling us the truth?? How dare they!! Making a generation of us feel less than just to sell magazines with what they thought were perfect young women!
It was at this point that I stopped buying fashion magazines and for the most part housekeeping and mothering magazines as well. Over the years in my head I had gone from the imperfect young woman to the imperfect wife and mother. It was time to change my way of thinking!
You Are Enough
So I set about to try and retrain my brain to not think less of myself compared to other women. It took a while, lots of stopping the thought process bus and saying aloud when needed, “Just back up and rethink it!
You don’t have to be like them! You are enough!” I had to be mindful and remind myself of what I was trying to do. Over and over, it finally started to sink in!
I had decided to twist the negative thinking around and make it positive. So instead of thinking that bikini article could never be me, I used it for inspiration and a challenge for myself. I thought…why not me one day?
And I tell you what….that me in a bikini moment happened! It’s never too late to challenge yourself with whatever you put your mind to. (I was fifty years old when I had my bikini moment!!) I was in the best shape I had ever been in. Walking…running and thinking of those magazine covers, I was able to use them as positive inspiration instead of negative self talk.
Never Too Late
I also bought a good camera and learned how to use it. (Another aspiration I had always thought was impossible). I can call myself a photographer. Then I learned a lot of computer editing programs. I can call myself a digital artist. And with the latest computer learning, I call myself a blogger. I can honestly say the brain retraining thing worked for me and lead me on a journey to better mental health.
I no longer see other women as better than me. I am happy when I see other women succeed and have wonderful lives. I finally learned to be happy with myself and just be me, with whatever I see that me to look like. It’s all about doing you. Happy with the way you are, and also happy with a new challenge for yourself if that is what you want.
I find it scary with all the social media young girls follow, like my magazines years ago, the negative self talk is worse than ever. Teaching our daughters at a very young age to value themselves as they are is crucial.
I have found peace in my own skin. So if I could go back and tell my younger self one thing, that would be it.
Just be you and find peace in yourself!
I love to pass on positive inspiration where I can, like doing this blog, to help and inspire other women.
Women Helping Women!!
Life Experience Wisdom
*Stop comparing yourself in a negative way…just stop it!
*Turn negative self talk into positive self talk. Be mindful of your self talk. “I am enough!” Remind yourself every day.
*Accept and value yourself as you are. The feeling of being at peace with yourself is amazing!
*You are never too old to learn to retrain your brain.
*Be You! And be the best you that you can!
Thanks for visiting, cheers til next time!
Grace
My Motto
When life throws baseball size lemons at you, that smacks you upside the head, stomp on those damn things and make yourself a cocktail!