Parenting Tip #2

Parenting Tip #2 Teach Self Confidence

I think this week my article will be the second of three parts on parenting tips.

Self confidence comes from feeling good about yourself after achieving something.

You could be a three year old that puts all your toys in the box at the end of the day, or a sixty-two year old like myself that just learned a new computer program…the result is the same!  A boost of self confidence!

Benefits of Self Confidence

This is so important for kids to learn and the younger the better.

The sense of growing and consistently accomplishing things, however small, will lead a child down a positive road.  Which in time will open up an endless supply of opportunities for them.  A sense of I can do anything is important.

A young girl that has confidence in herself is less likely to put up with being treated badly in relationships.

The challenge of peer pressure can be handled easier when a child has self confidence as well.  It just has an overall positive impact on their mental health.

Ways to Build Self Confidence

*Let kids do chores around the house.  Even toddlers can pick up after themselves.  Toys put away with some praise when the job is done.

*Let your kids be independent.  Let your child do their own homework for gawd’s sake.  Let them figure things out and speak with the teacher on their own.  You teach a child nothing of independence if you do their homework assignments for them!

It’s crippling them, and you are not preparing them for the real world by doing everything for them.  Your job as a parent is to prepare them to live on their own in a healthy positive mental state.

I knew a woman once that did the homework thing for both her kids, well into high school.  When the time came for college the boys were riddled with anxiety as they couldn’t cope on their own.  She had crippled them.  Neither finished college…Mom thought she was doing the right thing getting them good grades. 

So remember this next time you are tempted to finish your child’s assignment.  Kids have to learn actions and consequences…on their own!

*Teach your kids to learn from mistakes.  No one is perfect, we all fail.  The sooner they learn to look at failure as a learning tool, the better.  You just have to try again…no big deal.

*Praise your kids for achievements.  But not for every single thing they do.  Praise every minute tends to lead to a sense of entitlement and again will do more harm than good later on when they are out in the real world.

Some things should just be expected of a child.  No need to say…”Good boy Johnny for not running wild in the grocery store slamming into the back of everybody with the cart today!”  Seriously…that’s a given!

*Make them feel loved and valued.  Spend time with them playing outside, board games, even video game time spent together, and bedtime stories every night.

Some of the best memories I have of spending time with my kids is playing Mario Cart video games together, and reading crazy bedtime stories.

*Lead by example.  Kids are like little walking talking sponges.  They absorb everything around them.  So if they see you with self confidence they will mimic that and pack it away in their filing cabinets in their minds for later use, whether they realize it or not.  One day in the future when a situation comes up and makes them wonder how to handle it, that filing cabinet will pop open and they will say…”Oh yeah, that’s how Mom/Dad would handle it!”

*Remember to show empathy and kindness, no need to raise little entitled narcissists!

Life Experience Wisdom

*Give them opportunities to succeed or fail, both are needed to grow.  Let them do things on their own.

*Lead by example.  It shows them how to handle things with confidence.  Teach kindness and gratitude.

*Hug them and love them!  So they know they are important. There is less chance of them looking elsewhere for attention if they are getting it at home.

Thanks for visiting, cheers til next time!

Grace

My Motto

When life throws baseball size lemons at you, that smack you upside the head, stomp on those damn things and make yourself a cocktail!